Experimenting with Mobility Aids
When my symptoms first started, I was so scared.
I didn't know what was happening in my body or what was going to happen. Before I got sick, I had this idea that when someone became disabled it always looked like something as swift and clear as something like a spinal cord injury. For me, and for so many others, it can be so much murkier than that.
When it became challenging to stand and walk around I started experimenting with mobility aids. I was going to doctors all the time, but they didn't know what was wrong – I was on my own. I ordered my first cane online and kept it in my bag, pulling it out when I had to walk long distances or stand in lines. Shortly thereafter that I thought it would be helpful to have a wheelchair. I found one that got good reviews, was less than $300 and didn't weigh too much so I could lift it in and out of the car on my own.
Anna, a blonde white woman sits in a wheelchair in front of a garden. Her chair is perpendicular to the camera, but she is facing the camera and has a soft smile on her face. She’s wearing pink sunglasses, overalls, a cardigan and converse.
As hard as it was to be figuring things out on my own, it also felt really freeing. As my world felt like it was shrinking around me, I had some tools to expand and try new things again.
Over the course of the next year, I was fortunate to find doctors who were able to diagnose me. Suddenly, I had access to medication, therapies and tools that were specific to my illnesses. For a few years, my wheelchair sat in the back of my car unused, and eventually I sold it.
Anna, a white blonde woman, stands next to a statue of a big cat on large rocks. She’s standing and smiling at the camera. Her service dog, Luna, is standing next to her wearing a mobility harness.
Last year, a friend of ours invited my partner and I to the zoo. Even though I used every tool I had access to in preparation – I was hydrated, had taken all of my meds, wore supportive shoes, had Luna with me, etc., about an hour in I was spent. I could feel the blood pooling in my legs and my vision tunneling. I was used to feeling bad on bigger outings. It wasn't until my friend, who's an ambulatory wheelchair user, offered to let me have a turn in her chair that I realized it didn't have to be that way.
Within minutes of using her wheelchair I was able to keep up with the conversation again. I was enjoying looking at the animals rather than thinking about how to get out of there as fast as possible. I realized then that there were some things I was just avoiding because even with all of the tools I was using, they weren't possible. But with a mobility aid, they might be.
So I started experimenting again.
Over the course of the last year I've been avidly researching and scouring Facebook marketplace for a wheelchair that would support that same opening and freedom I experienced years ago. This month, the stars aligned and I was able to purchase a manual chair and a power assist.
I'm so excited for the world of possibilities that will be open to me again. I'm excited to zoom around with my friend and our dogs, to go to COVID safer events that are mostly standing room and so much more.
This is a pattern I see all the time with my clients. We get used to our reality and it's hard to see beyond what is in front of us to what is possible. And there isn't a lot of space to try things on and see how they feel without judgement. If you'd like support in considering what it would look like to have your needs met in a deeper way, I have a few offerings to support you.
If it's helpful for you to do this kind of work in community, I would love to see you at my class Chronically Curious: Exploring Disability Identity. There's a session this Friday 12:30-2:30 pm PST and another one on October 26th from 11 am - 1 pm.
If you'd rather do this kind of work one on one, I have space for individual coaching clients! The first step is to schedule a 30 minute consultation call.
What kind of access might be possible for you?
